Howdy gang,
I hope
you are not too restless for updates on my little Ewok and I. The last month
has actually been more or less uneventful, but it has been rather busy. Before
I really get in to Ewok updates (and trust me, there are plenty), I had been
planning on a totally different concept for this post. I had been totally ready
to launch in to some of the current frustrations that I have been having
lately. I was all ready to start bitching about how the labor division at our
home has been extremely one sided lately. I was ready to do that…until today.
Let me start from the beginning though.
You
see, now is an extremely busy time for both my wife and I at our separate jobs.
We have been working long days, getting home late, and just feeling exhausted
at the end of it all. We get to the weekends and we would rather take turns
napping and/or playing with Elizabeth than really do much of anything. We had
yet another round of sickness (I know right?! I have no idea how at this point,)
go through our family and that just added a whole different wrench into the
mix. As I’ve made mention before, my wife and I always had a pretty good
division of labor before Elizabeth was born and we had managed to keep it up
pretty well after she was born. I usually do laundry, vacuum, take garbage out,
clean the garage, split firewood and maintain the wood furnace. My wife (do to
her God damn food allergies) ends up cooking every night, feeding Elizabeth,
paying bills, general cleaning, etc. We have many split chores as well, I would
say it is about a solid 30/70 split on dishes, we take turns on taking care of
the chickens, scrubbing toilets, etc. About 3 weeks ago though, the scales
seemed to shift unfavorably to my side.
While
my wife wasn’t feeling very well, she is still Elizabeth’s main food source so
she became the de facto baby watcher. That left me to do, well…everything. I
was doing all of the household chores, my own work, and helping to watch Ewok.
It was really starting to take its toll on me. But, and there is always a “but”,
today I really got a better feeling for what my wife was dealing with. Due to
Elizabeth starting on teething again, (Dear Lord, I thought we were going to
get more of a break. This will be teeth 9 and 10.) she had to call in to her
work on Monday/Tuesday. That meant she had to go in today to get caught up and
to get a few hours towards her paycheck. She woke me at 645am, which is NOT my
ideal wake up time! My wife went in to work and left me with an extremely crabby
10 month old. My wife wasn’t at work long, but in that short amount of time
Elizabeth managed the following:
1)
Threw up in our bed, she was fine though.
2)
Found my guitar and pushed it over.
3)
Tried to wrap a cord from my jacket around her
neck.
4)
Tried to wrap my phone charger around her neck.
5)
Took 2 nasty and “juicy” poops.
6)
Turned on my Xbox, grabbed the game that was in
it, and then threw it.
7)
Fought every and all attempts to nap.
8)
Did her best to stop me from eating breakfast or
lunch.
9)
In a failed attempt to eat breakfast, I left her
in the crib where she chewed on the crib so much that there was varnish all
over her face when I finally gave up on eating and grabbed her.
It was a full day for a little lady I guess. By the time my
wife got home, I was using Google to check on the sentence lengths for parents
convicted of infanticide (only 25% serious) and was searching for Parental
Stress Reduction. On a side note, I am unsure who the hell wrote the blog that
I stumbled upon, but they are insane. I am stressed out to the point that I am
ready to put her in a kennel and one of their suggestions was to “go on a nice
walk outside with your child”. Mother fucker, I’ve been up dealing with a
screaming crib midget that I am ready to let stick her finger in a light socket
and you are telling me to go on a walk?! Anyways, where the hell was I? Oh yes…
By the
time my wife texted saying she was on her way home, I was all ready to give her
the business when she got home. It was while Elizabeth was finally napping that
I had time to really process the day. I realized that I had the day that my
wife has pretty much every single weekend and most mornings. You see, as I’ve said
before, my wife is a freaking saint. On weekends she lets me sleep in unless
she either needs to tag out (and even then, she holds out until after 9am) or
if she has something that she really needs to accomplish. During the weekdays,
with very few exceptions, she is up at around 515-530sih (sometimes earlier) so
that she can get herself and Elizabeth ready for work and daycare. She then
works a full day, and then comes home, cooks dinner, feeds/plays/cares for
Elizabeth, cleans up and then gets ready for the next day to do it all over
again. I got a small taste for the last 3 weeks and today in particular. It’s
not that she is being lazy, there simply isn’t enough time in the day to
accomplish everything. When you are a parent, your priorities change immediately.
Your child is now top of the list. There are dishes? Too bad, the baby is
hungry. Laundry needs to be done? Tough shit, baby needs to be changed. Garbage
needs to go out? Tough titty said the kitty, because Elizabeth wants to play.
I ended
up with a newfound appreciation for the shit my wife puts up with on a daily
basis. While she argues that I was pulling my fair share of the weight, I found
that I hadn’t been. Not really at least. I have the luxury of daycare. On days
that I have “off” I am never really off because of work, so Elizabeth stays in
daycare. If I end up not being needed or if I actually get caught up on my
work, I GET to go pick her up early and we come home and play. By the time my
wife makes it home, it is go-go-go. There are bottles to be washed, baby to be
fed, dinner to made, and bedtime routine to be kept. Except for weekends, she
rarely gets that “fun time” that I do. Today was really an eyeopener for me. From
here on out, I plan on taking a bigger share in the workload.
I know
I said that I would be doing some Ewok updates, but I actually have a 2nd
post idea that just came to me and I think those updates are better suited for
that post. In the meantime, as always, I thank you for reading. Please check
out Fatterhood on Facebook. While you are there, some friends of ours are in
the process of adopting a child, despite my warnings, and there is a link for a
gofundme page that they have set up. My wife and I had looked in to adoption
while we were having trouble conceiving and please believe me that it is an
expensive and exhausting process. This couple though will make amazing parents.
There are so many kids in the world that are waiting for a home, that it is
kind of upsetting that they make you jump through so many hoops to adopt a
child, but any asshole (including me) can have a kid. Grrr. Anyways, if you go
to the link, any amount that you can spare will go a long way in their lives
and in the life of a child. Thanks again and PROST!
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