Howdy gang,
I am currently
writing this post while sitting in my hotel bed, 3 hours away from home,
sipping on my Ecto-cooler juice box (yes they are back!), and eating my Jurassic
World fruit snacks and I am not sure how to feel. I still have a sick little
Ewok at home. Which means that I am glad that I am not getting pooped on,
thrown up on, coughed on, or just generally snotted on. But due to some weird
twist of fate mixed with a serious dose of Oxytocin…I wish I was there.
Boogers, poop and all.
Our poor little peanut got sick over the
weekend, as you are aware. She had seemed to be doing better for while, but my
wife got a call from the daycare on Monday saying that they were pretty sure
that she had pink eye. The silver lining to this was that we didn’t have to
leave work to pick her up right away because she was the 3rd or 4th
one in the room to show symptoms, so they assumed the damage had been done. I
had to do a supply run to one of our blood mobiles which meant 6 hours on the
road in a van that didn’t have working air conditioning in 90 degree heat,
while I filled it with my McDonald’s induced farts the entire time. I rushed
home as soon as I could and met my wife to pick her up from daycare. They said
that if she could be treated yet that night, that there was a good chance that
she would be able to come back to daycare the next day and neither of us would
have to miss work. What a great thought.
We took her to our local Urgent
Care since we couldn’t get in to our doc. She was doing ok, but her right eye
was all goopy, had diarrhea, and was just generally not feeling great. So it
was not emergent. We went in, got registered, went through triage and then we
found out that children under a certain age must be seen in the E.R., not in
Urgent Care. That really sucks for my insurance. Next time I will tell them
that I have pink eye so that I can save the damn money. Anyways, we waited. And
we waited. And we waited. Other people were starting to get all upset, but
considering that we got pushed back due to a person with a stroke coming in, a
obviously broken leg, and a small child that had apparently brained herself on
a coffee table, my wife and I were okay with waiting. We were finally seen
after about 2.5-3 hours and Doc came in and said, “Yep. It’s pink eye”. Well no
shit. How long did you spend in school? Give me a damn script so that we can
fill it and go home!
By this time it was 830 and we were
in a mad dash to get the script filled because the doc and daycare said that if
she had 3 applications of the ointment that she could go back to daycare and we
wouldn’t have to miss any work. Well…miss isn’t the right word, but you get my
meaning. Of course, the pharmacy was busy as all hell and there was some sort
of complication with the script. So we waited about another 30-45 minutes
before we could even leave there. Got home and we quickly did some math only to
realize that either way one of us was going to have to stay home until we could
get the other 2 applications in her eye. Tuesday I was the only person on call,
but our scheduling department wasn’t sure where I was going to be sent, only
that I was for sure getting called in. So my wife, the saint, called in to work
and let me sleep in until I got the call saying that I didn’t have to be in
until noon. I could have just stayed with her and dropped her off on my way to
work!
I made it in and apparently one of
our other mobiles had been cancelled due to a truck breaking down, so one of my
amazing coworkers offered to work my shift for me so that I could pick up Da
Butt and take her home and snuggle her. I took her up on that offer and grabbed
the Ewok and we went home and snuggled on the couch. It seemed to do her a lot
of good too. But later that night she started getting a stuffy nose. It became
so stuffed that she couldn’t breathe right and so she had trouble sleeping. I
am calling at least 25% bullshit though, because she didn’t seem to have any
trouble sleeping as long as you were holding her. I ended up staying up until
about 3am with her just rocking in my recliner and of course watching
Supernatural.
I went to work on Wednesday and my
wife was sending me picture updates most of the day. She seemed again to be
doing ok, but when I got to the hotel and called my wife she informed me that
the pink eye had spread to the other eye, that she had a pretty good cough
going and was very sleepy and just generally upset. She has been pretty damn
good natured though throughout this whole thing though. She fusses a little
bit, but she just wants to be snuggled. That I can handle. I won’t get home
until about 11p.m. on Thursday, but I plan on bolting home and getting some
great daddy-daughter snuggles in on my recliner as soon as I possibly can.
Like I said before, daycare centers
are just Petri-dishes, but they are a necessary evil. I would love to be in a
situation where I didn’t have to work (or at least work a regular 9-5) and I
could spend more time with her, but that just isn’t the case. My wife makes the
real money, but I have the insurance. It seems as though we have painted
ourselves in to quite the corner. In the meantime, I plan on just wearing a
HAZ-MAT suit whenever I pick her up from daycare and then spraying everything
we own with Lysol and bathing Elizabeth in Purell every night. If only those
damn window licker kids would stop blowing their snot bubbles on everything.
Gross.
As per usual, thank you all for
reading, check out Fatterhood and Facebook, don’t be afraid to comment or drop
me a line. And until next time…Prost!
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