Earlier this week my wife, Elizabeth and I went to Target for a basic stock up trip. I freaking love Target. Don't really know why, but I do. My wife and I spend an insane amount of money there (bit with our Red Card we would be idiots not to!). One of my favorite things to do is embarass my wife in public, I will do it any where, but since we spend so much time at Target it usually ends up happening there.
*Quick side story- I was once asked to leave a Victoria's Secret store because I was following my wife around with a mannequin torso asking how the outfit looked on me. When asked to "stop harassing the mannequin" my brilliant reply was "If she didn't want it then she shouldn't dress like that". Anyone who says 5hat about real women when they are assaulted should be punched in the face, but this was a mannequin torso so I don't think she was too offended.*
Anyways, this last trip Elizabeth got really fussy in the cart so I picked her up and carried her around the store. My wife went about her normal shopping while the Ewok and I went on an adventure. We found a Frozen waffle maker! This thing was dope as hell! It made different waffle pieces of Olaf that you put together to build your own snowman! With Elizabeth in one hand I grabbed the box and ran to find my wife. When we found her I busted in to a rendition of "Do you want to make us waffles" set to the tune of "Do You Want to Build a Snowman".
Do you want to make us waffles?
We can have them any time.
I can buy the syrup,
OH when will we dine?
My wife played right in to my trap and simply replied "No." Which lead to me sinking my shoulders and singing,
Okay, fine...
I would think it is safe to say that my wife is kind of excited to share the embarrassment with Elizabeth when she gets older. Elizabeth seemed quite indifferent to my antics as she just burped and fared the whole time. I know...she is totally my kid. My poor wife has been putting up with this crap for 12 years now! If you are ever in a Midwest Target, strolling through housewares and you find home decor that is arranged in to an offensive word or phrase then more than likely you have stumbled across The Fat Dad's handywork. Thank god she still puts up with it and hopefully Elizabeth will be as good of a sport about it. Cheers!
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